100 Curious Contrivances: Unveiling the Mysteries of a Shady Magic Shop

Welcome, wanderers, to the shadowy corners of the magic market! As veteran adventurers well know, not every item of arcane interest is found within the brightly lit and orderly shelves of a high-class boutique. No, indeed! Often the most intriguing, peculiar, and downright bizarre magical artifacts are tucked away in the dingy backroom of a shop that lurks in the less reputable parts of town.

Today, we peel back the curtain on these eccentric establishments, revealing an astonishing array of mystic miscellany you might uncover within. So steel your nerves and tighten your purse strings—it’s time to dive into our list of 100 things you might find in a magic shop on the bad side of town.

Let’s dive into the full list of 100 quirky items that might be found in a magic shop on the bad side of town:

  1. A crystal ball filled with swirling, eerily glowing fog.
  2. Bottled banshee wails.
  3. A goblin’s tooth necklace that supposedly wards off evil spirits.
  4. A deck of tarot cards, each card crawling with living illustrations.
  5. Pouches of pixie dust that induce uncontrollable sneezing.
  6. Vials of shimmering potion that promise to reverse aging (side effects may include turning into a baby).
  7. A cracked wand that only works when held upside down.
  8. A slightly rancid unicorn horn.
  9. A cursed mirror that reflects a monstrous version of the viewer.
  10. A faulty invisibility cloak—only makes your clothes invisible.
  11. Shrunken heads that mutter prophecies in forgotten tongues.
  12. A quill that writes rude responses when you try to write with it.
  13. A one-eyed teddy bear that sees the future.
  14. A locket that whispers sweet nothings.
  15. A doorknob that can turn any wall into a door—for better or worse.
  16. An unbreakable string that always leads you to the nearest tavern.
  17. Boots that leave no tracks… but squelch loudly with every step.
  18. A pocket watch that changes the time, rather than tells it.
  19. A slightly singed manual on how to train fire elementals.
  20. A scarf that can never be fully unwrapped.
  21. A love potion that smells suspiciously like cheap perfume.
  22. A map that reveals the location of lost socks.
  23. A helmet that gives the wearer the ability to speak with plants.
  24. A calendar that foretells tomorrow’s weather with dubious accuracy.
  25. Dragon-scale gloves that keep your hands warm but ignite paper on touch.
  26. A soap bar that cleans anything—even memories.
  27. A truth-telling tongue depressor.
  28. A book of cryptic spells written in an uncrackable code.
  29. A compass that points to whatever the holder least desires.
  30. A bag of mixed elemental gems—handle with care!
  31. A music box that plays a different tune depending on the listener’s mood.
  32. A broom that sweeps on its own but always in the wrong direction.
  33. A pair of glasses that translate any language but backwards.
  34. A stone that screams when left alone in the dark.
  35. A diary that writes the entries for you—often embarrassingly truthful.
  36. A coin that always lands on its edge.
  37. A hand puppet that has its own (rather rude) opinions.
  38. A bottle of shadow ink that can only be seen at night.
  39. A jar of ghostly fireflies that can spell out dire warnings.
  40. A feather pen that refuses to write lies.
  41. A teapot that brews anxiety-calming tea but incessantly whistles.
  42. An amulet of endless thirst.
  43. A box of infinitely replenishing mundane buttons.
  44. An enchanted magnifying glass that shows miniature creatures living on mundane objects.
  45. A dream catcher that occasionally lets nightmares slip through.
  46. A lock without a key that only opens to riddles.
  47. A talking mouse skull who claims to have once been a powerful wizard.
  48. A sword hilt that, when swung, creates a blade of air but can’t cut anything.
  49. An everlasting candle that never burns out but also never provides light.
  50. A pair of mismatched earrings: one allows the wearer to hear whispers from afar, the other emits a low, persistent buzzing sound.
  51. A silver bracelet that gives the wearer cat-like reflexes but also an insatiable desire for fish.
  52. A whistle that only dogs can hear.
  53. A crystal that glows brighter the closer it is to cheese.
  54. A pair of tweezers that can pluck out lies.
  55. A pair of shoes that tap dance on their own.
  56. An endless roll of parchment—it’s a very long story.
  57. A chest that locks from the inside.
  58. A hat that gives unsolicited fashion advice.
  59. A pipe that blows bubbles filled with smoke.
  60. A goblet that turns water into wine, but only the sour kind.
  61. A jar of self-spreading peanut butter.
  62. A bag of sentient marbles that tend to wander off.
  63. A “beware of the dog” sign that growls menacingly when approached.
  64. A loom that weaves tales instead of cloth.
  65. A ring that makes the wearer’s voice echo dramatically.
  66. A fan that when opened, displays a different landscape painting every time.
  67. A fake beard that can change colors according to your mood.
  68. A pin cushion that screams when poked.
  69. An enchanted paintbrush that paints only in various shades of blue.
  70. A flute that can only be heard by those over 100 years old.
  71. A comb that changes the user’s hair color with each use.
  72. A door knocker that knocks back.
  73. A tome of fables that change endings every time they are read.
  74. A jar of enchanted honey that tastes like different types of fruit.
  75. A basket of ever-ripe apples that taste like onions.
  76. An umbrella that only opens when it’s sunny.
  77. A spoon that turns everything it stirs into a hearty stew.
  78. A key that can open any lock but gets hotter the longer it’s used.
  79. A monocle that only sees the past.
  80. A lantern that dims when danger approaches.
  81. A cursed coin purse that always contains one less coin than you need.
  82. A flask of liquid luck with questionable potency.
  83. A thimble that protects the user from all types of harm, but only while sewing.
  84. A lamp that only lights up in total darkness.
  85. A notebook that critiques what is written in it.
  86. A pair of mittens that can’t be separated.
  87. A bag of fertilizer guaranteed to grow any plant—into a weed.
  88. A tapestry that changes its design based on the viewer’s worst fears.
  89. An alarm clock that rings an hour late.
  90. A bell that rings silently.
  91. A vase that holds flowers which never wilt, but always smell slightly off.
  92. An apron that cleans itself but changes color unpredictably.
  93. A tinderbox that lights wet wood but only emits cold flames.
  94. A fishing rod that catches anything but fish.
  95. A spice rack with unknown, potentially magical, seasonings.
  96. A scroll case that is impossible to open without saying a secret word.
  97. A telescope that shows distant galaxies, but upside-down.
  98. A quiver that refills with arrows that always miss their target.
  99. A set of kitchen knives that can cut through anything, except food.
  100. A bottle of wind that, when opened, releases a small tornado.

In the shady, dimly lit corners of a bustling city, there’s always a magic shop brimming with wondrous items just waiting to be discovered. These stores, with their odd items and peculiar shopkeepers, are the perfect places to spend a few hard-earned coins and potentially uncover the key to your next adventure—or at the very least, secure a memorable souvenir. But remember, not all that glitters is gold, and while these items might be peculiar, quirky, or outright bizarre, each holds its own potential for fun and danger.

Finding the perfect balance between oddity and utility is the name of the game when browsing these off-beat magic shops. A shopping spree might lead to purchasing a broken wand or a cursed mirror, a coin that always lands on its edge, or boots that leave no tracks but squelch loudly with every step. Yet, no matter the result, there’s always a story to be told and a laugh to be shared. Isn’t that the very essence of a good adventure?

Whether you’re an experienced wizard looking to add to your collection, a rogue in search of the perfect trinket, or a fighter needing a magical edge, these shops are bound to cater to all your magical curiosities. However, remember to browse with caution and never underestimate the trickster spirit of these oddball emporiums. The shopkeeper may have a mischievous smile and a gleam in their eye as they guide you through their bizarre collection. After all, they know what lies behind the seemingly harmless facade of their peculiar goods.

In a world brimming with magic, a magic shop can be the perfect place to stoke the flames of curiosity, ignite the thrill of discovery, and set the stage for stories to unfold. The magic shop on the bad side of town is not just a store—it’s a treasure chest waiting to be unlocked, a doorway into a world of limitless imagination. It’s a testament to the wild, untamed magic that defines the fantasy realms we all love to explore.

In your next Dungeons & Dragons session, why not guide your party into the hushed whispers and rustling corners of the local magic shop, and let them discover the magic that lurks within? After all, every item, be it a harmless trinket or a powerful artifact, has a tale to tell, an adventure to spark. And who knows? The quirkiest, most unlikely object might just be the key to an unforgettable journey.

Make Life as a DM Easier!


Or check out my ChatGPT Backstory Generator

Paul Bellow

Paul Bellow

Paul Bellow is a LitRPG author, RPG game developer, and old school webmaster. He's been playing tabletop games since the 1980s. He started Random Tables RPG as a way to give out free D&D and Pathfinder content to the world. Enjoy!